“The Gifts of Imperfection” outlines 10 guideposts for living a wholehearted life. This month, we’re focusing on three that are all about stepping into your own power, being deliberate, and being unafraid:
- Letting go of numbness and powerlessness
Teaming together is at the heart of what we do. So this guidepost, which encourages people to reach out when they need help, instead of engaging in numbing behaviors, is so important to us. Our default as humans often is to retreat, and to numb whatever negative feelings we’re experiencing. But there’s power in asking for (and accepting) support.
Even though it might feel like weakness at the time, being able to ask for support is actually a strength. We see this concept in our work every day. Whether it’s a community member who needs a little extra support that month, or a family making the decision that a spot in our community is best for their loved one, asking for help is often the beginning of them stepping into their power.
There’s no shame in walking away from numbing behaviors, or feeling powerless. And asking for support is exactly how to do that.
- Letting go of scarcity and fear of the dark
This is one of the concepts that most impacted us from this section of the book. Brene Brown quotes the work of her friend, Lynne Twist, and it’s something we can all relate to: We live in a culture of scarcity where we think, ‘I did not get enough sleep’ on first waking, and ‘I did not get enough done’ when laying down to sleep.
We must create a mindset of “enough” in order to find joy in our lives. Finding gratitude instead of scarcity in our daily lives can make such a huge difference.
The mindset of being enough applies to who we are at Help in the Home, too. For our community members, they may sometimes think they’re not able to do what others are doing, or what they think they *should* be doing. But joy comes from being grateful for who you are, and how you’re able to connect with others. And that’s our job: to inspire and build those connections, so we can then build our community members’ gratitude for who they are.
Within our community, our joy also comes from the value that people are bringing to our community — not what is missing. We’re not worried about scarcity, or seeing what’s not there. We see each of our community and staff members as integral pieces of the puzzle, each of them “enough” on their own. Together, they bond together to create a team that is “enough,” as well.
- Letting go of the need for certainty
We’d be lying if we said we didn’t love answers. We always want to “do the right thing” and we like to be sure that we’re on the right path. But this mindset can also be crippling and can create anxiety. Letting go of certainty allows us to live one day at a time, reach out to friends for their opinions, and act each day on what we believe is the best.
Letting go of this entrenched need for certainty is so helpful in the mental health space. Each day is different, and brings new, scary challenges. So embracing the uncertain, and being able to move forward even when we don’t necessarily see the exact path we’re embarking on, is crucial.
That mindset drives much of what we do at Help in the Home. When we can let go of the need for certainty, we can join together as a team and support each other in difficult situations, even where there are no clear answers.
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No matter where you are in life, what you do, or what challenges you’re experiencing, embracing your imperfections and pursuing a wholehearted life can be your path to joy.
We would love to hear your thoughts as you read through these guideposts to wholehearted living over the next few months. We’ll be outlining the guideposts in a 3-part blog series and talking more about them in our newsletters through the end of 2019. But if you’d like to join the discussion even more, we would recommend that you read the book too! Whether you have a loved one who is a community member here, you’re thinking about starting services from Help in the Home, or you just want to experience more joy in your life, through your imperfections, we’d love to hear your thoughts about the book once you finish!